talk talk. all you ever say is "blah blah blah"

Time is ticking away so fast. I can't believe my friend Jennifers wedding, is next weekend! uh. i Don't even have shoes yet! For as busy as i have been I sure have slept a ton this week.

Its seems like i'd rather be asleep, then awake dealing with the clutter and mess.

I should, go grocery shopping and make some healthy foods, instead of bagel bites and spaghetti o's! yuck.. I feel my early am heartburn already coming.
luckily i have bedside tums!


I still need to get a bench for the house. I would LOVE to have a bench, but i may be settling for two chairs and a lil table. either way. i want to cute up this house..

So things that have been weighing on me: Friends.

I saw Aimee last night. We didn't even talk really. she said goodbye on her way out. I guess that's good. since i wasn't really making it easy to hello by hiding behind some strangers.

I just wish things were the way they used to be. I wish that she was still my best friend and we could just laugh about this and go on with our day. But it's not that easy. I will never be the same and that breaks my heart.
I really feel as if i lost more from the friendship then she did. I know she misses me, i know she feels badly about us. But she isn't making an attempts to repair, neither am i. So us two stubborn ladies will remain strangers .

she did like my hat and was upset i had made from of her hair. I didn't make fun of it to her. but she knows i don't like it. I would fix it. if she called me and asked me to fix it. I would. but that's an awkward conversation to start up: "uh your hair looks like shit, lemme fix it!" i don't think so.


So i have made two trips to target lately. filling up on goodies i don't really need. which is exactly what i shouldn't be doing, since work is slow and rent has increased. but who can resist their fall fashions? i finally got a red knit cap ala Elizabeth Town. which was also my sad time movie. I haven't watched it in years. but boy can it make me feel empty inside. I love it.

oh holy hangovers. i could use a coffee.

i have never in my life been a daily coffee drinker. in fact in the last few years i have hardly touched the stuff. but the crazy days i've had have forced me to suck down that sweet caffeine-- now i crave it.
as well, it's better than crack!

so one of my favorite "sleeping songs"